Feel Strong in Your Being
I’m likely only going to talk about this subject once. At least in this way.
It’s been on my mind for a long time now.
And while this post is a little longer than usual, it’s really important.
I also wanted to let you know that we have officially opened the doors to our annual LIVE FREE Say it, Sweat it, Get it Challenge!
During the course of the week, I will be giving you short easy-to-follow, uplifting movement videos that you can do from the comfort of your home.
I only run this challenge LIVE once a year and I’ll be giving away a ton of free prizes, doing live chats and more. So you don’t want to miss it!
Plus, I made a really cute video for you with a surprise appearance at the end. CHECK IT OUT HERE!
Ok, back to my subject today.
Funneling Anxiety Into My Body
It’s about my body. And well, frankly yours.
You may remember that pregnancy was difficult for me. I tried really hard to embrace the changing of my body, but admittedly, I was worried about what would happen on the other side
I sort of obsessed by looking at images of women’s postpartum bodies on Instagram.
You know the ones.
They were the ones people share 6 weeks after having a baby, showing practically no signs that a baby was ever there.
This was not comforting to me.
It felt like a lot of pressure to get there.
But, on the other side there were women who showed their “real” postpartum bodies.
(I put “real” in quotes, because at this point, I think we can all agree, that even if your body looked like it never had a baby 6 weeks after birth, it’s still very much real.)
These more “real” bodies were the ones that showed the stretch marks, the soft belly, the “reality” of what it’s like to be postpartum.
I need to be honest with you. Those images didn’t provide any comfort either.
What if I was unable to embrace my body they way they did?
It was like I couldn’t win either way.
All the images of women’s bodies were exacerbating my anxiety about my own body.
And then, it hit me like a ton of bricks.
I knew what all this mental madness was about.
I realized I was funneling all of my anxiety about becoming a mother and having a baby into my body.
Rather than sitting with all of the worries, fear, doubts and the unknowns about my life basically changing FOREVER, I spent countless and mindless hours worrying about how my body might look when all was said and done.
It’s sort of like a bride, who is naturally nervous about her pending nuptials, but funnels all her anxiety into every small detail, becoming a bridezilla.
(I kid you not, one of my best friends spent over $1000 on different lipsticks for her wedding. She was obsessed with finding the perfect shade of neutral pink. Don’t worry, she returned most of them. AND, despite the fact that she was 100% certain she was marrying her soul mate, she she was very aware that she was funneling her anxiety about marriage, her new identity and her unknown future into nothing other than lipstick. So we let her have lipstick as her diversion:)
Anxiety about dramatic changes in your life is completely normal.
And like I said, we often funnel that anxiety into strange places.
But as far as my body went, something crazy happened.
On November 27th, 2017, I had my baby girl via c-section. (Full story here)
And over the following 5-6 weeks, everything in my world changed.
In regards to my body, I don’t know how, but when I looked in the mirror, I felt something I never felt before.
I Felt Strong in My Being
I didn’t feel strong in my body, I felt strong in my being.
Read that again.
I didn’t feel strong in my body, I felt strong in my being.
And that felt stronger and more powerful than anything I have ever felt in MY BODY before.
In that moment, I decided that I ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT talk about or share images of my postpartum body in order to show you my progress.
Or lack thereof.
Why?
Because the moment I share images about my body with the world, I begin to tell the world what I value in myself. Even unintentionally.
And because we teach people how we want to be treated, if I teach you that my body is what I value most in myself, it means that this is what you may come to value in me as well.
And damn it, I have soooo much more to offer than that.
On Instagram alone, there are thousands of images of women’s bodies.
And believe me when I say, I am all for celebrating the miraculous female body in all it’s forms, shapes and sizes!
But really?
So you lost all the baby weight.
Ok, and, so what?
So you didn’t lose all the baby weight.
Ok, and, so what?
I wasn’t interested in being part of any conversation on social media that would contribute in ANY WAY to another woman’s anxiety about her body.
No thank you.
As it pertains to postpartum in particular, there are a million other things I would want to be valued for.
Where I Want to Place My Value
I want to place my value on the fact that I carried and birthed a human being.
That I am nurturing this child.
That I was being patient and not losing my shit when I didn’t know what I was doing.
That I hired a chef to cook me food, a supreme act of self-care that made a huge difference.
That I was moving slow and not putting pressure on myself to be or do anything.
These, and much more, are the things I am most proud of.
Not that I fit back into my skinny jeans in a certain amount of time.
(And for the record, I feel like I look great! But what I think is far more important than what anyone else thinks, thank you very much!)
Listen, I get that this is an odd thing to share with you, being that I am a fitness professional.
But the truth is, I am more interested in how you are being, how you are feeling, what your thoughts are, and how you are acting in the world than I am about the shape of your body.
By now you know that I believe movement in your body creates movement in your life.
Exercise, fitness and movement can be a way of shifting all the things that I’ve mentioned here so that you simply FEEL better, more connected and less fearful.
Along those lines, let me be clear. If losing weight is your goal, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with that!
(There seems to be a movement in the wellness world right now that one should not want to lose weight. I disagree with that, because I have worked with clients who have dropped anywhere between 30 – 100 lbs and as a result lowered their blood pressure, got rid of diabetes, and are living happier, healthier lives. Let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater.)
But I thought it was important to share this.
I want you to understand what I stand for here.
I stand for you.
I stand for your personal fulfillment.
I stand for you feeling strong in your BEING.
And maybe that means getting stronger in your body.
Or it could mean slowing down and doing physical things in a less extreme way.
If this is something that appeals to you, then I invite you to join me in the LIVE, annual Say it, Sweat it, Get it Challenge.
During this week-long challenge, I’ll be giving you easy-to-follow, uplifting movement videos that you can do from the comfort of your home.
I would REALLY love to hear from you on this topic. Does it resonate with you? Does it spark any thoughts that you want to share? Will you join me in the Challenge? Tell me about it in the comments.
I am so excited to move with you in the coming weeks and months!
Here’s to your health, your love, your life and all the goodness that comes with it!
Love,
Erin
P.S. I have a HUGE announcement next week that you don’t want to miss. So keep an eye out!
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