How to Chelsea Handler It

How often do you worry about what other people are thinking?

Once a month? Once a week? Once a day? More? 

I ask because not too long ago I took a dive into that worry zone myself.  I noticed an increased desire to hide and play small. I felt like I was doing something wrong by sharing my gifts – like I was violating some big rule by fully being myself and answering my life’s calling.

Have you ever been there? Feeling like you need to play small so you don’t offend people, upset them or “step on their toes” somehow?

It sucks, doesn’t it?

When we hold ourselves back to please others, we end up losing touch with who we really are.

We lose touch with our joyful, inspired selves and slip downhill – we become moody and cranky. Sometimes we even say or do things we normally wouldn’t say or do, which means we can end up hurting ourselves and the people we love.

When I recognized that I was cowering from life’s callings, I realized it was time to Chelsea Handler It.

This late night comedienne is known for her bawdy, “I don’t give a flying f#*k what you think of me” humor. She reminds me that sometimes you gotta’ do what you want, when you want, and how you want to do it.

Are you ready to Chelsea Handler It?

Yes, it’s a verb. Here’s the “official” definition, in case you were wondering:

v. When a woman stands in her attractive or even unattractive, funny, entertaining, smart, powerful self while speaking her opinions publicly, despite those opinions being in contradiction to the popular view; even so much as being seen as rude, grotesque, weird, or obnoxious.

We can get a lot of “push back” when we behave like this brassy blonde.  We are raised to be nice, not rock the boat, and make sure we’re not selfish. (And I’m especially talking to the ladies here!)

When we start doing what we want to do, and doing it a way that’s right for us, we can feel a lot of pressure to go back into hiding.

In fact, Sheryl Sandberg’s book, Lean In, says that the more successful a woman gets, the more she is disliked. 

However, success and accomplishment sometimes require that we put our blinders on and not care what anyone is saying OR thinking.

I know from personal experience that I’ve needed to be a little “selfish” to accomplish some of the things I’m most proud of in life.

By that I mean I had to believe in myself, my ideas, and my mission regardless of what people thought. And that can be a little scary. I get it.

But every single day, we have a choice.

We can hide or we can “Chelsea Handler It.”

But how do we do that, you ask? Let me share my 3 favorite ways to “Chelsea Handler It.” 

1) I keep the above pic of Chelsea as a screen shot on my i-phone whenever I’m feeling doubtful. I know – it’s kinda’ weird. But in the spirit of who cares… “Who cares?!” Right? Any time I do this I’m reminded to be bold and even a little brassy if I need to.

I’m also reminded that a woman can be entertaining, funny, and successful while standing in her absolute truth – strong opinions and all. She can say what is on her mind without being afraid of repercussions or backlash. 

2) I created THIS playlist to help me along. I titled it, TOUGH IT UP, CHELSEA.

WARNING: The songs on this playlist are NOT for the faint of heart. There are some ‘choice’ lyrics and a bit of ‘nastiness’ to them. So, you may want to skip my songs and find your own.

I don’t usually wake up in the morning saying, “I’m gonna go kick some ass today!” So when I’m feeling lethargic or sad, this playlist helps me tune into a sort of badass, I’m-ready-to-rule-the-world, vibe. Sometimes that’s exactly the energy we need to get something done (or even started).

Music shifts your mood and it can help evoke a very particular energy that you don’t always have immediate access to.

3) I put on my ‘eff-it pants. That’s right, as in ‘eff it. They’re a pair of old, raggy sweats I’ve had for like, EVVVVVEEEER!  They ain’t cute. At all. But, walking the streets of my neighborhood in them makes me feel like I can do whatever the ‘eff I want.

It gives me permission to not worry about being pretty, perfect or together. Sometimes I’ll even teach class in them. Why? Because I can. They are my ‘eff-it pants and WHO CARES?!?!

So now it’s your turn. Do you have ways to “Chelsea Handler it?” 

Do you have your own techniques to stop worrying, stop hiding, and let yourself play full-on?

If you do, then come over to the BLOG and tell me. Don’t be shy. If they’re as weird as my techniques, so what? Who cares, right?!

And if you want an even bigger boost in your life and you’re really ready to get yourself out there and go for it, then check out my 4-week Magical Manifesters program.

We are starting Monday, May 13.  This is the last time I am running the course at this price, so if you have been thinking about it, now is a great time to jump in.

It’s been a life-changing catalyst for entrepreneurs and creative artists all over the world. It will help you get crystal clear about what you want, and then help you create an action plan to get there.  In the process you’ll build a deeper and stronger sense of confidence so you can stop worrying and start being yourself.  

And that’s what we’re really talking about here. Coming back to yourself, standing in your full power, and saying, ‘eff-it. 

We can’t stay hidden because we’re worried about what others think of us.

Here is what a few students had to say:

Here is what a few students had to say:  

Let’s do this!



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10 Responses to How to Chelsea Handler It

  1. Arti says:

    Erin! Love your blog. So funny how we (I) want to play it safe sometimes- I found myself hesitating to even write this comment. As in who cares what I write? — then I’m like — wait a minute-
    Who cares that know one cares?!!
    Im going to chelsea handler it. Say what I want. Do what I want. It doens’t matter if they are listening. Doesn’t matter if they listen and hate it. Doens’t even matter if they listen and love it.

    So here’s to chelsea handling it.
    I;m totally going to put her picture as a screensaver on my iphone. Thats what screensavers are FOR. Right now i have loving affirmations. I am enough. I have enough. I make it a point to not just see the phone but to actually say those things to myself. A few times a day.

    Gotta start changing my neurocircuitry!
    Thanks so much for the Chelsea inspiration.

  2. Jackie says:

    Erin, this blog post MADE MY DAY! I absolutely love the idea of Chelsea Handling it! I admit that I care way too much about what other people think of me. It’s a terrible habit and I can be way too nice, but I am working on it. I am now starting to realize that what I say and do is important and it doesn’t matter what others think! Especially if it makes me happy! In the words of Pink, “So what? I’m still a rock star!” You know what helps me? Is wearing what I call my “sassy red pants.” They are bright red and make me feel fabulous! Thanks for the inspiration, lady!

  3. Nichole says:

    I love you E!!! This is terrific!


  4. Nema says:

    It was very refreshing to read your blog, Erin. Thank you! Sometimes I’m still standing there full of wonder about the world I am discovering.
    My spirit was freedom-loving enough to travel into a rape as a finally point of a long healing-process as well as a liberating-moment from a family secret around rape and coming out of it unraped. Not the done-thing. I paid, severely. Especially women were very harsh. It was quite a journey to understand that my behavior and words dared questioning 2700 years of western culture and that there was nothing wrong with me, no reason to be afraid of my being and my energy. So here I am, on my way to create the Life my heart dreams and sings of. No more holding back. And a card more to put on the table: The “I Chelsea Handler It”.

  5. Nat says:

    Kickass post. Sent you some thoughts via email but wanted to add to the conversation publicly too. Feminism and standing-up-for-yourself FTW! Let’s leave gender stereotypes behind and stand in our power, in our beautiful, *powerful* truth. Right now, I can apply this to how I’m running my new web development business. Courage, here I come! Awesome timing.

    Thank you so much for the reminder and encouragement. Everything you put out is full of love. I feel very lucky to have found you and your work!

  6. That’s why I love watching Chelsea Handler!